I write sci-fi thrillers about cyborgs with brain implants. I just finished the first draft of my second novel, and it is my darkest writing to date. There’s blood. And gore. And all kinds of cyborg programming gone awry. So as I begin the revision process in the New Year, I thought it would be fun to lighten things up with a new blog series.
IF I HAD A BRAIN IMPLANT…
I would sync it to the coffeemaker.
Coffee is a morning necessity for me. There are some days when I don’t even trust myself to drive to Starbucks unless I’ve already enjoyed a cup or two at home. And while I have a decent programmable coffeemaker, it isn’t good enough. It could be better. WAY better.
If I had a brain implant, I would program it to notify the coffeemaker when I wake up. My brain implant would be able to read my brain waves. It would learn my sleep patterns and would detect the difference between sort-of awake, and definitely awake. No more setting the clock the night before. No more broken late-night promises that tomorrow will be the morning I get up – really get up – when the first drip of java hits the carafe. No more tar-thick brew at the bottom of the carafe when I finally stumble out of bed.
Picture it with me… there would be fresh coffee even on those holiday mornings when you hit snooze twenty-three times and sleep way past the coffee timer. Or when your children keep you up half the night. Or when your dog won’t stop barking at the goats (but then again… maybe that’s just me).
I’m sure there are more practical and beneficial uses for brain implants. But teaching my coffeemaker to read my mind is at the top of my list.
Stay tuned for the second thing I would do, if I had a brain implant…